“God, my life is a mess. How are you ever going to use me again? I don’t understand why you’ve allowed this to happen. Lord, please help me.”
I prayed those words countless times over the past four years. In 2006, I was diagnosed with a crippling autoimmune disease called Ankylosing Spondylitis, which causes hardening of the hips, spine, and major organs. Within months of the first symptoms, my life was transformed.
I was Super Mom. Maybe you know what I’m talking about: wife, mother, Kindergarten Room Mom, entrepreneur, Registered Dietitian, Bible teacher, crafter, family gourmet cook, and last, but not least, manager for my daughter’s modeling career.
I certainly tried, but God showed me I couldn’t do it. The illness crippled me. I spent three years as a prisoner in my own body, unable to move without excruciating pain.
My former Super Mom Super Powers were gone. I couldn’t stand up long enough to cook dinner, fold laundry, or sit on the floor to play with my children. All of those roles were delegated to someone else, while I took up residence on the living room sofa.
Those haunting prayers returned, “God, how are you ever going to use me like this? I’m more than broken—I’m shattered. You have stripped me of myself. I don’t know who I am anymore.”
HAVE YOU EVER BEEN SO BROKEN THAT YOU THINK GOD CAN’T POSSIBLY USE YOU?
I was there right where you are. It took time—years, in fact—for the Lord to humble me and then build me back up in Himself. By pouring myself into the Bible
I DISCOVERED MY IDENTITY WASN’T SUPER MOM, IT WAS IN CHRIST.
God doesn’t love me for everything I accomplish on a daily basis. He loves me because His Son died for me and on the third day came back to life, paying for my sins.
GOD LOVES YOU TOO, BUT NOT BECAUSE OF WHAT YOU DO FOR HIM.
Can we ever DO enough? Can we ever BE perfect enough?
Super Mom isn’t the answer. Jesus Christ is.
I HAD A CHOICE TO MAKE. I could either spend the rest of my life blaming God for ruining me with this horrible disease, or I can trust that even in the midst of the gut-wrenching pain, my life counts in Christ.
YOU HAVE A CHOICE, TOO.
If God has allowed you to be broken, maybe even shattered, you have a decision to make. Will you shake your fist at Him for destroying everything? Or, will you surrender to His plan, even though it’s NOT what you desire? Will you say Yes to His call on your life?
WILL YOU SURRENDER YOUR MESS TO HIM?
Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed,
for His compassions never fail.
They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness.
I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for Him.”
The Lord is good to those whose hope is in Him, to the one who seeks Him;
It is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord.
WILL YOU WAIT QUIETLY FOR THE LORD?
Carrie Cooper @ comfortedbyGod.blogspot.com