The Sanctity of the Bedroom

The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife and likewise the wife to her husband. 1Cor 7:3

I hate our bedroom looking messy and it probably stems back from when I was just 16 years old.  I’d become engaged to a boy and his mother had given me a book to read about the value of marriage and the marital home.  I know we were very young back then but there had been a good reason.  He was dying of cancer and his and my parents already had a very good idea that he wouldn’t be around long enough for us to get married but as his fiance I was allowed into the hospital to visit him at any time.

I was probably too young to realise this at the time but I did read the book and took on board much of what was said and still today apply many of those things.

I love our bedroom to look inviting and not messy.  Recently my eldest daughter helped me measure and shop for new curtains and matching bedding and I couldn’t wait for Graham to get home that night to see our new look bedroom. It looked like something from a classy hotel and I was thrilled with the result.  So was he as he had no idea of the surprise I’d planned for him and he’d been thinking our room looked small and tired but hadn’t said anything.  The new colours and decor now make the room look fresh and larger somehow.  He certainly made sure I knew he appreciated how much I cared about the room that cemented our marriage.

I firmly believe it is the wife’s role to make the home a place the husband wants to come home to daily.  We hear so much of marital problems, husbands staying at work long hours or other things interfering with their marriage.  Whilst it is true that many women work away from home these days and the housework might be lacking, the bedroom should still be their private domain and one that is always inviting.  If the husband is one that is home more then perhaps this is something he could be looking at.  The bedroom of a married couple is one that should be sanctified, set apart, kept special and always inviting to the couple it was intended for.

Many years ago I remember seeing the bedroom of some friends of our’s and it was cluttered with mess – clothing, newspapers, books and all sorts of things everywhere, even on the bed.  I knew this wasn’t a once-only situation but something that was constant in their household.  I don’t believe for a moment that this was the only problem in their marriage and the cause for their breakdown but I do feel that perhaps their bedroom wasn’t valued by either of them and wouldn’t have helped their situation.   Somehow the care taken in a marital bedroom spills over to the care taken in that marriage and both husband and wife benefit from that effort.  What do you think?

Kathie M. Thomas is an Author, Blogger, Speaker and Virtual Assistant Coach & Trainer. Her passion is about helping women return home to work, using skills they developed in the workforce, so they can be home fulltime for their families.


4 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Lynn Mosher
    Aug 23, 2008 @ 01:22:14

    Kathie, I think this was a great post and I agree. Making home, and the bedroom, a welcoming place is essential. My husband thanks me all the time for doing so.


  2. pfmacarthur
    Aug 23, 2008 @ 01:32:59

    Honestly, allowing my husband to have his messy “clothes pile” in the bedroom and my not complaining about it is one of the reasons our marriage stays happy 🙂 Life is too short to worry about the small stuff.


  3. Dawn
    Aug 23, 2008 @ 19:35:28

    I’ve posted on this subject and I also am in agreement that this is a need area where others don’t pay attention and miss out on the bliss!


  4. HEvencense
    Aug 25, 2008 @ 18:51:41

    I agree with Patrice. This seems to be largely a matter of personal opinion, taste or preference. Should it be raised to the level of religious dogma? Probably not.


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