Our Own Reflection

Many moms can become lonely. Friendships can be hard to keep up when your families’ needs come first. It is a wise woman who knows this. Yet even though we may know that sometimes our wishes and desires have to be put off, that doesn’t mean we feel any less lonely at times. It doesn’t mean that our hearts don’t yearn for some good girlfriends who can understand our soul.

Just as our children need good friends in their lives to walk alongside them, encourage them, and be strong for them during those times when they aren’t feeling so strong – so also, do we as adult women need this in our lives. In fact, just when we may need this the most (when we become mothers) is when it becomes the toughest to cultivate.

So, what do we do? What do you do when you feel like there is no extra time in the day to get together with another woman for lunch? What do you do if you are having a hard time making friends who you feel truly care about you and your family? What do you do when you feel really lonely for women friendships?

I have been on both ends of this spectrum. I’ve been thankful – most of my life – to have been able to easily make and keep friends wherever I’ve lived. I always thrived with girlfriends in my life to help teach me things about myself, to encourage me, and to just be a sounding board at times. Yet, I also hit what I call a “desert” period in my life with friendships. I’ve had close friends leave my life and holes have been left that created quite a deep loneliness in my heart. It was a new feeling for me.

As lonely as this time has been, God taught me some special truths through it that I wouldn’t have learned had I been filling my heart and mind with only the words from the mouths of friends. Instead, I was forced to go straight to the mouth of God for what He thought of me, what He wanted of me, and how He would help me. I learned that it is good to have no one to depend on at times other than my Lord. For so often we can let others fill His shoes in our life when that is not their place. And oftentimes we can lose a little bit of what makes us unique if we are in the company of women who are stronger, or more verbal than we are. But with God – all He shows us is our own reflection. It may not be one we want to see at times, or it may be just exactly what we need to see to encourage us to move onward. But it is pure, it is authentic, and it is full of love for us and our future.

Nothing can ever take the place of earthly friendships. As women, we are social beings and we were created that way on purpose. God knows we need friends. But if you find yourself in-between friendships, or maybe in a position where you’ve been praying for years for sweet, Godly friends to enter into your life – then be encouraged. I believe they will come for each one of us in God’s perfect timing. Until then, know that you have the best friend of all who is right there beside you. He wants you to unload your daily heartaches and burdens on His shoulders, share your dreams and hurts, ask Him His thoughts and perspective, and He wants to be able to encourage you and show you just how beautiful and lovely you truly are. He wants to show you what HE sees in you so that you can blossom as a woman.

You can have a very special friendship with Him that will help hold you together until those women come. And you will find that even when they do, God will be the first person that you turn to with all those thoughts and feelings that you’d normally run to a girlfriend with. She’ll still be there to hear them – but they will be filtered with the wisdom, grace, love, and devotion of your Heavenly Father. The best friend a woman could ever have.

 

 

~ Dionna Sanchez

http://beautyinthestorm.blogspot.com

Do We Get It?

Do we get it? Do we get the fact that God truly cares about us? Or do we relegate Him to this entity that is up there pointing a finger down on earth simply granting or denying requests? Yes to her – no to him, etc.

God showed me this morning and reminded me in a way that only He can do – that He loves me. He cares for me and my feelings. And I was overwhelmed at the way in which He did it.

Sometimes I think we forget who God really is. He is a Father. A father who hurts with His children. A father who rejoices when we rejoice. A Father who feels taken for granted of and under appreciated at times. He is a King. A King who makes the tough choices for our lives when we can’t bring ourselves to make them. A King who at times, has to forego a battle in order to allow His people to win the war. He was a man. So He understands the pain of a mother, the fear of a child, and the love of a man and wife. He knows what it feels like to be betrayed, to be confused, and to feel overwhelmed. That is my God. And how often I forget that He “gets it.” He gets me.

This morning I was burdened in my heart over something. I’m not going to mention what that was for it is between me and God. But I was struggling with it. Struggling with my own pride and desires – my wants and wishes – and trying to reconcile them with what I knew God would want and expect out of me. I was trying very hard to lay down my heart.

God – in a way that only He could – overwhelmed me unexpectedly with the answer to a request that my heart dared not ask out loud. And I felt like the man in “Facing the Giants” who got on his knees and said “God, I’m overwhelmed!” It wasn’t anything big like winning a football championship or getting pregnant when you think you’re infertile – but it was still big to my heart.

God showed me that sometimes He might just be waiting on us. He might want to reward us for waiting patiently or being willing to say “no” to what we want for what He wants. He just wants to see where our loyalties lie.

And I AM overwhelmed. I’m overwhelmed to have a Heavenly Father who loves me despite my human inadequacies and flaws. A God who believes in who I can be and knows me so intricately. God has faith in ME! He sees who I can be and He gets me more than I get myself. Oh what a love.

I am overwhelmed. Are you?
~ Dionna Sanchez blogs at http://beautyinthestorm.blogspot.com – you can also follow her on twitter – http://www.twitter.com/DionnaSanchez

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The Trap of Comparisons

Comparisons. They kill us. They kill us because they damage our self-worth. One day we might think we are doing pretty well at something but we can always find someone who is doing better and then that wounds our pride and our self esteem.

God tells us to do “everything to the glory of God.” What does that mean? To me, it means that I need to write my articles to the glory of God. I need to write the best I can. The best I can. It would be unfair of me to expect an article to come from me that is the equivalent of an article from someone who has been writing for 35 years and is a best selling author. But I can write an excellent article just the same.

To do everything to the glory of God means that I need to take care of my home the best that I can and give it to the Lord. It doesn’t mean that my home has to be immaculate with designer cushions and name brand furniture. It doesn’t mean that I have to live in a large house in a fine neighborhood. It simply means that I need to live in my house thankfully and take care of it to the best of my abilities giving all that I have to the glory of the Lord!

You see how we can twist things so easily? Simply by comparing our lives, our looks, our things – with those of others? It is a great tactic used by Satan to push us backwards, hold us down, and get us to feel sorry for ourselves. And it works.

I think that women naturally are curious. We naturally check each other out. We watch what other women wear, where they go to shop or eat, what they put in their homes, etc. And then if we admire them – we think that in order to be admired, we too, must adopt those standards. But we are not always necessarily correct. And we do a huge disservice to ourselves and our families to place our lives on a rotation of comparison. For instead of living our lives out the way that God intended us to, with our own personalities, set of skills, desires, gifts, and direction – we relegate our lives to mere trends. Someone new will always come in who has something different to bring to the plate. We will always be changing what we think and want when we offer ourselves up to comparisons. Because we will always fall short in our minds. And if we don’t, then we might think greater of ourselves than we ought.

If I can do everything to the glory of God – if I can be all that I can be for the glory of God – it takes me out of the equation. It puts the emphasis on God where it belongs. I can be happier, more satisfied, and more fulfilled allowing Him to work through me instead of me trying to do all of the work myself and expecting myself to live up to standards that He never set for me.

Comparisons are a trap. They simply set us up to fall because we rate who we are as people and compare that with someone else. It will never be fair.

Let’s leave the comparisons behind and start embracing who we are and who God has placed around us. Let’s enjoy the gifts that He has given those who inspire us and thank Him for those blessings instead of coveting them. And let’s allow our own hearts and world to be opened up for Him to bless us in the ways that He chooses – even if it’s not the way in which we would have preferred.
~ Dionna Sanchez/Founder: http://www.EmphasisOnMoms.com

 

I Went With the Majority

I’m a big Survivor fan. I think I like the show so much because it’s about people and how they interact with one another and make choices. I’ve always enjoyed watching people and so this show fascinates me as I observe people making the same mistakes time and time again. It says a lot about human behavior.

I have noticed that when it’s time for the Survivor players to vote someone off, a lot of them write a name down and then make the comment that “I went with the majority” followed by, “I’m really sorry I had to vote you off.” To me, that is not a good excuse for writing someone’s name down or betraying someone. Have we no better mind of our own than to simply follow the majority?

Someone once made the comment that whether in the game of Survivor or in the real world her word was all she had and she was going to stand by it. She immediately became my favorite in that game because that is my theory in life as well. My word is all I have left sometimes and it means a lot to me. It says a lot about me.

I don’t ever want to simply become like a sheep following the pack without using the brain in my own head to decide if something is really what I want to do or not. I want to have integrity in all I do – whether it’s a game or not. Some people say that you can separate the two; I disagree. For you can never separate what is inside of someone. It will come out sooner or later.

We are what we are. Who I am means everything to me. I may not play this game of life perfectly. I will make mistakes, I will let people down at times, and I won’t be everyone’s favorite person. But I do plan on being true to myself and true to the One who made me. For me, that means living as honestly as I can, with as much integrity, compassion, and character as I can.

Whatever mistakes or mess-ups I make in my life – at least I will own them. They will be completely mine. And I will know that I didn’t make them because I simply went with the majority.

~ Dionna Sanchez

http://beautyinthestorm.blogspot.com

God’s Chisel